Hate Me
by SpencerReidsTrueLove
Summary: Suguru has writer's block. Reiji is the worst lyricist of all time. Shuichi has no confidence. Can Yuki save the day with a message from his heart?


I don't own anything. Seriously. Wish I did, but I don't. Shuichi Shindou, Eiri Yuki, and all the rest of the Bad Luck, NG, Gravitation Universe, that belongs to Maki Murakami. And the beautiful song 'Hate Me' belongs to the amazing group Blue October.

The song is one of my favorite songs of all time, and I was just thinking how it totally fit Yuki's frame of mind. So here it is. My quick little one-shot where Yuki finally let's Shuichi know how he feels. Oh, and I took a _teeny_ bit of creative license and altered a couple words of the song to make it work with the boys. Sorry! Hope no one cares. You really can hardly tell I did anything... So, enjoy!

Bad Luck gathered in the studio with their producer and manger to discuss their upcoming concert.

"So, Fujisaki, how is the song going?" Sakano asked. All eyes turned to Suguru, who had a miserable look on his face. He poked his fingers together, looking down at his feet.

"Well, you see, I just... I CAN'T DO IT! I'm the worst composer ever! I let Bad Luck down! I let the fans down! It's all over, all because of me! Seguchi is going to kill me! Cousin or no, he won't care! I'm sorry! Please, accept my resignation as my penance." Suguru spun into a rage, dropping to his knees, holding out a letter of resignation.

"Shut up. You are just in a rut. Now get up, go sit in the corner, AND WRITE SOME LYRICS BEFORE I BLOW YOUR FACE OFF! I - uh - I mean, do your lovely manager the favor of composing some beautiful lyrics." Reiji commanded, as Suguru retreated to the corner, paper and pen in hand.

"We're supposed to debut the new song at the concert in two weeks. We have to have something new for the fans!" Sakano whined. Shuichi leaped to his feet.

"I'll do it!" He shouted, hands on his hips in a triumphant stance. Everyone gave him doubtful looks.

"Shuichi, I don't know. Last time you tried to write our lyrics, you ended up humming an entire song..." Hiro pointed out.

"You're right. We're fucking doomed." He slumped. There was a loud banging sound behind them. They turned to find Suguru beating his head into the table repeatedly.

"Oh, I know what's wrong with Fujisaki." Hiro said, pressing Suguru against the wall. His hand trailed up his leg, grazing his nether regions lightly. Suguru's face turned twenty shades of red.

"H-hiro..." The next thing Hiro knew, there was a foot in his face, knocking him across the room. "What is with all of you and your homosexual perversions?" Suguru shouted.

"Hey! I'm no homo! Remember, I'm with the lovely Ayaka. I just meant that you need to get laid, that's all."

"I do not... I … uh … I'm going home." He grabbed his laptop and messenger bag, storming out.

"Well, I guess this means it's up to me." Reiji said, leaning against a speaker.

"You? Have you ever written a song before?" Shuichi questioned.

"Nope." Everyone fell over. "Oh! Have some faith! I'll do it! You'll see! I'll write a song. You'll love it." And off she went, retreating into her own world to write a best selling song.

The next day Reiji gave her newly written lyrics to the band.

_Love in the moonlight_

_ Feeling so right_

_ All I need is you_

_ Hold me tight_

"Hiro... these... are the worst lyrics I've ever read..." Hiro nodded in agreement.

"We'll be laughed off the stage."

"She's going to be the death of us." Suguru added.

"Hey! This is all your fault! If you'd just write some damn lyrics, then _she _wouldn't be trying to ruin us!" Shuichi shouted.

"Well I don't see you writing anything!" He countered.

"I'm going home! Call me when someone has a song I can actually sing!" Shuichi stormed out, heading straight home.

Yuki was in the kitchen over the stove when Shuichi stormed in.

"I can't work with those people! They're all insane!"

"Kind of calling the kettle black, Shuichi." Yuki retorted, stirring his soup. "It's good you're home early. Dinner's ready. It won't be cold. So sit down, and shut up." Shuichi fell into his seat, but didn't give up on the conversation.

" 'Love in the moonlight, feelin so right, all I need is you, hold me tight.' " Yuki turned to look at Shuichi with a disgusted look on his face.

"What?"

"Yeah, that's the chorus of the new song Reiji wrote for me to sing."

"You're kidding?" Yuki set a plate down in front of Shuichi.

"I know! And Fujisaki can't write anything for some reason, and well, we all know what it's like when I try to write a song..."

"Yeah, but even your crap is better than that."

"What am I supposed to do? There's just not enough time for me to write a song! If I open the concert with _that_ I'll lose half of the audience before I even get started." Shuichi took a bite of the meal Yuki had prepared.

"Well, whining about it isn't getting anything done."

"But... I just don't want to put out anything that isn't the best. Bad Luck is... everything to me. If I lost that, well ..."

"Then stop your constant whining and accept my help." Shuichi looked up at Yuki.

"What?"

"I'll write you a song. Like I told you before. But you have to _actually_ perform it this time." Shuichi jumped up and ran over to Yuki, throwing his arms around him.

"Really? Oh, I didn't want to ask, but, Yuki it would mean _so_ much to me! Can you have it finished in time?" Yuki nodded.

"But I'll have to work all night, so _you_ will have to leave me alone."

"Okay! I promise! You won't hear a peep out of me!"

When they were done eating, Shuichi agreed to wash the dishes while Yuki started work on the song. When he was done, he peeked past the door of the office to watch Yuki type away. He stood there for about five minutes before he heard Yuki's voice.

"You can come in if you're quiet." Shuichi squealed, it wasn't often Yuki allowed him in his office while he worked.

"Thanks, Yuki."

"But don't read it." Shuichi nodded. To show he wasn't going to peek, he moved his chair so that he was next to the monitor, staring at Yuki. They sat in silence until Shuichi fell asleep against the computer. A few hours later, Yuki was poking Shuichi.

"Done?" Shuichi asked, looking up at Yuki.

"Yeah. Now you just have to put the arrangement with it. Fujisaki can handle that part, right?"

"Right. Uh... can I read it?"

"It's yours, isn't it?" Shuichi scooted over so that he could see the words.

_I have to block out thoughts of you_

_ So I don't lose my head_

_ They crawl in like a cockroach _

_ Leaving babies in my bed_

_ Dropping little reels of tape_

_ To remind me that I'm alone_

_ Playing movies in my head _

_ That make a porno feel like home_

_ There's a burning in my pride_

_ A nervous bleeding in my brain_

_ An ounce of peace is all I want for you_

_ Will you never call again_

_ And will you not tell me that you love me_

_ Just to stick it in my face_

_ And will you never try to reach me_

_ It was I that wanted space_

_ (chorus)_

_ Hate me today_

_ Hate me tomorrow_

_ Hate me for all the things I didn't do for you_

_ Hate me in ways_

_ Ways hard to swallow_

_ Hate me so you can finally see what's good for you_

_ I'm sober now for three whole months_

_ It's one accomplishment that you helped me with_

_ The one thing that always tore us apart_

_ Is the one thing I won't touch again_

_ And in a sick way I'd like to thank you_

_ For holding my head back late at night_

_ While I was busy waging wars on myself _

_ You were trying to stop the fight_

_ You never doubted my warped opinions _

_ On things like suicidal hate_

_ You made me compliment myself _

_ When it was way too hard to take_

_ So I'll drive so fucking far away _

_ That I never cross your mind_

_ And do whatever it takes in your heart_

_ To leave me behind_

_ Hate me today_

_ Hate me tomorrow _

_ Hate me for all the things I didn't do for you_

_ Hate me in ways_

_ Ways hard to swallow_

_ Hate me so you can finally see whats good for you_

_ With a sad heart I say goodbye to you and wave_

_ Kicking shadows on the street for every mistake that I have made_

_ And like a baby boy I never was a man_

_ Until I saw your soft eyes cry_

_ And I held your face in my hands_

_ And I swore that nothing'd make it go away_

_ Just make that smile come back and shine_

_ Like it used to be _

_ And you whispered_

_ 'How could you do this to me?'_

_ Hate me today_

_ Hate me tomorrow_

_ Hate me for all the things I didn't do for you_

_ Hate me in ways _

_ Ways had to swallow_

_ Hate me so you can finally see whats good for you_

Shuichi stared blankly at the words on the screen.

"Y-Yuki, this... is this about me?"

"Technically, it's about me. Since you're the one singing it." Without another word, Shuichi grabbed Yuki, pulling him forward and kissing him.

"Yuki, I love you. Okay? I could never, ever hate you. Is that what you want? For me to hate you. I mean, is that why you act the way you do sometimes?" Yuki stood up.

"The song speaks for itself. I hope it goes over well with everyone." He walked out of the room, leaving Shuichi stunned. When Shuichi poked his head into the bedroom, Yuki was laying back on the bed, staring at the wall.

"Yuki... can we talk?" Yuki shrugged.

"I'm listening."

"Well, first, the song, it's absolutely amazing. It's going to be the biggest hit Bad Luck has ever put out."

"I'm glad you like it." Shuichi crawled into the bed, laying down next to Yuki.

"And, also, I don't want you to feel that way. There's plenty you've done for me. Plenty. You love me. Even if you don't really say it, it's okay, cause I know you do. I mean, I just... I love you so much Yuki. I couldn't bear to ever lose you."

"I thought Bad Luck was the most important thing in your life." Yuki retorted as he put his arm around Shuichi, pulling him to his chest.

"Well, almost. You are the _most _important thing. I guess, I just thought that went without saying." Shuichi kissed Yuki's chest.

"Do you want me to make love to you?" Shuichi nodded, a slight blush falling over his cheeks.

"Yeah, I do."

"Come here." Shuichi climbed on top of Yuki, who wrapped his arms around his singer's neck. They locked their lips together in a heated kiss while Yuki did as he promised, taking Shuichi's body for his own. Shuichi was taken over by passion as Yuki's mouth claimed every inch of Shuichi's exposed skin. It was like tiny bombs going off all over his body as the writer's skilled tongue swirled in all the right places. Yuki grasped Shuichi's arms, rolling their bodies so that he was on top of his lover. He sucked on his own fingers, moistening them to prepare Shuichi, but Shuichi took Yuki's hand in his.

"No. You don't have to. Just... do it." Yuki raised an eyebrow. Usually, his energetic lover was whiny and complained a lot. _Stop! It hurts! Ow! _He would always scream.

"You sure...?" Yuki hesitated.

"Yeah. I want it. _Now_." Shuichi squirmed beneath the large body on top of him, making himself more accessible to what he wanted. Yuki wrapped Shuichi's lips into a tight kiss, his tongue exploring the wet cavern, as he thrust deep into his waiting lover. The pink haired boy moaned into Yuki's mouth, dragging his nails down the pale skin of his back. Yuki paused, allowing Shuichi's body to get used to him. His muscles tensed around Yuki's erection as he pulled out to the tip only to slam back in. Yuki's mouth continued to muffle his lover's screams as he moved in and out of the young boy. Yuki broke their kiss, planting gentle kisses over Shuichi's chest. Something was different about Yuki. He couldn't place it, but his movements, actions, were more gentle than they normally were. Slender fingers wrapped around Shuichi's shaft, causing him to gasp. Yuki moved his hand up and down, teasing him with his fingertips.

"Ngh... Y-Yuki..." Shuichi bucked his hips, trying to take in as much of the writer's length as he could. "I can't take it..."

"Wait..." Yuki grunted, wanting them to climax together.

"I can't... unh..." Yuki's fingers stopped moving as he quickened his pace, becoming slightly more aggressive. Finally, both men reached their pinnacle.

"Shuichi!" Yuki cried as he filled his lover with hot fluid. "I love you..." He panted harshly as Shuichi shook underneath him. He always had an overwhelming physical reaction when he came. His whole body would quiver, head to toe, and his face would turn the sexiest shade of pink. Not to mention the way he would curl up into a little ball until he was finished. As much as Yuki hated to admit it, he found the pink haired mess underneath him to be the cutest thing he had ever seen.

"I... love...you more...Yuki..." Shuichi choked out in between breaths.

A/N – Okay. I know. It totally sucks. When it was an idea in my head it was all super bad ass, but now I'm re-reading it, and wow. I hate it. But I'm going to publish it anyways, and let the readers be the judge. After all, us writers tend to be our biggest critics... right? Well, thanks for reading anyways! ^_^


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